Some dogs have trouble inhibiting their excitement and have to literally be taught how to relax. Here are three techniques to help achieve this goal. However, keep in mind that none of these will work unless you address your dog’s baseline needs before training. Also, some dogs that experience extreme anxiety or arousal may need behavioral medication to be able to truly relax.
Karen Overall’s Protocol for Relaxation
This is the most well known relaxation exercise. It was published by Dr Overall in Clinical Behavioral Medicine for Small Animals, in 1997. It is a highly structured program, with the dog staying still as you perform various actions - starting with easy things like counting to 3 or taking one step backwards, and progressing toward going to the front door, knocking, and pretending to invite someone in. In the original the dog is in a sitting position, however I almost always teach it with the dog lying down, usually on a bed or mat.
The Protocol is divided into "days" but it is not expected that you will progress day by day as listed. Some dogs have trouble with a particular task and need to repeat it many times before they are able to relax while you do it. Other parts may come easily to him and you will be able to perform it once and move on. Each "day" is structured to include easier "warm up" and "cool down" tasks at the beginning and end. If you want to shorten the day's work, remove some of the tasks from the middle.
You want your dog to not just stay while you perform each task, but to be able to relax while you do increasingly exciting things. Watch your dog's body language. If he is calm, you will see his tail lowered and still or moving slowly. His ears may be perked and he will be watching you but his face should not be tense. He may choose to put his head down on the floor or roll his hips sideways or lie on his side -- these are all signs of relaxation. You may praise, pet, and/or treat him and move on to the next item. If you see your dog becoming less relaxed -- tense face, head lifting up high, tail straight up and stiff or wagging quickly, tensing his body as if he might get up -- either repeat the item you're on until your dog relaxes again, or even back up to a previous item he did well on. You may use your dog's name and the word "stay" to remind him of his task. You may praise him as he stays if he needs the encouragement.
There are free downloadable audio files (as mp3s) of the protocol here.
Here is a playlist of the audio version as videos on YouTube.
Here are demonstration videos of dogs doing the Protocol for Relaxation:
Relaxation Protocol Demo Video by championofmyheart
Relaxation Protocol: Karen Overall - Day 1 - Session 1 by Lisa Bartel
New Relaxation Protocol Day 1 by Positive Pawz Training
Suzanne Clothier’s Really Real Relaxation
This technique is newer and the full protocol is only available after purchase of the DVD, streaming video, or course. In deference to this, I will not put out the full information here. Like Dr Overall’s Protocol for Relaxation, the RRR teaches the dog to hold a position (specifically down, in this case), but now the owner is also still and relaxing, as a cue to the dog. At first it’s very short, and builds duration over time.
Here are demonstration videos of dogs doing Really Real Relaxation:
Using Suzanne Clothier's Really Real Relaxation Protocol by Kizz Robinson
Really Real Relaxation with Kona and Kit by CanineCountryAcademy
Emily Larlham’s Calm Settle/Capturing Calmness
This is the least structured (and easiest!) approach to reinforcing relaxation. You simply reward your dog as you see that he’s settling on his own, and go about your day. The more you reinforce this behavior, the more your dog will do it.
Simply walk up to your dog when you see him relaxing, and calmly place a treat on the floor right between his front paws. Or sit nearby, wait for your dog to lie down or show other signs of relaxation, and place a treat between his front paws.
Usually we talk about using high value treats during training, but this time you want something that won’t get your dog super excited. If your dog gets excited anyway, that’s okay. Simply go about your day, ignoring your dog, until he learns that getting up and following you won’t lead to anything good - but continuing to relax will!
This is easiest to do if you have treats stashed around your house, in places that you can easily (and quietly) reach but your dog can’t.
Here is a full video explanation:
Here is an older video from Emily with more footage of dogs just learning to settle: